"It's a great plan to ensure that more people vote Democrat," explained Ulrich Olsen, Obama Senior Campaign Official In Charge Of Getting As Many Votes For Obama As Possible At Any Cost and former ACORN employee. "We get these people released today, and they still have plenty of time to register as Democrats and vote for us in November."

When it was explained to Mr. Olsen that some states prohibit convicted felons from voting, he was ready with an answer: "We've already taken that into account. We just claim it's racism whenever someone tries to ensure that only people who are legally allowed to vote actually vote. That's worked pretty well with our opposition to Voter ID laws. Just ask anyone who has a show on Current TV."

"We're also looking at ways that we can pardon people convicted of state crimes," Olsen continued. "The Constitution doesn't grant the President the power to do that, but when have we ever cared about the Constitution?"

Asked how he knew that convicted felons would be more likely to vote Democrat, Mr. Olsen just started laughing.

"Isn't it obvious?" he asked.